Believing Again
by forevershipper37
Summary: Kurt's faith and trust in Jane is restored but what will it take for her to have faith and trust him again? Lots of angst to begin with but plenty of shipper Jane/Kurt. Rated M for later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

I do not own the characters of Blindspot or of Bluebloods.

I do have to say I was disappointed in the fact that the writers made Allie pregnant on Blindspot. I thought they were better than that. And now, previews with Kurt and Nas kissing?

Jane and Kurt all the way!

This is my first fanfic in quite some time and my first Blindspot and Bluebloods one. Please be kind!

This is how I wish October 12th's episode would have gone. I have also added some past history that didn't happen except for in my shipper heart. The characters from Bluebloods will not appear towards the end. Though a hint, "Remy" and Danny have history. There is plenty of angst though I promise that Jane and Kurt will eventually get together.

Chapter 1:

Amidst various levels of turmoil, a doctor approached the team. "How is she?"

"Both patients are going to be a fine," the doctor answered the man standing in front of him. "Whoever patched her up and operated on her before the paramedics arrived saved both of their lives."

"Way to go," Patterson swung an arm around Jane, giving her a hug.

"The Marshall wanted asked to see someone named Jane."

"That's me," Jane responded after a moment of uncertainly looking at the others.

"Follow me."

"Jane." Kurt reached out, grabbing her arm, her eyes flew to his. "Thank you." She offered a small smile and turned.

Once inside Allie's room, Jane found Allie reaching for her. She came closer, albeit rather uncomfortably. "I don't understand why you wanted to see me. Kurt should be in here with you."

Allie chuckled. "Kurt and I aren't together—we haven't been for a long time. I've been at some of my most vulnerable these past couple of hours. I don't want any man—even the father of my child—anywhere near me right now."

"OK, I can understand that."

"I wanted to thank you. Your quick thinking and not letting anyone's doubts and concerns get in the way, saved my child and myself."

"I didn't think. I don't even know how I knew how to do what I did. I just did."

Allie's eyes widened. "You have amnesia."

"Kurt never told you?"

"No. But I could tell he was hurting—I did what I could to reach him." Allie let her voice trail off and Jane looked away. "He still loves you." Jane laughed sarcastically causing Allie to shake her head. "I don't understand how you two have drifted so far apart."

Jane looked at her then before she could help herself, "I was kidnapped and tortured for over three months. Kurt left me a voicemail telling me he cared for him and I left him twenty-four explaining some things that I had just learned about my past, admitting my feelings for him and begging for his help. He never listened to any of them. Instead, he arrested me and turned me over to the CIA. While they were torturing me for information I still have almost no clue about, he was sleeping with you. Trust me—he doesn't love me."

Allie sighed. "You still love him though."

Jane blinked and looked away. "It doesn't matter. He doesn't trust me. And I don't trust him not to doubt me again."

"That can be complicated."

"You're telling me."

Jane looked back at her. "I'm glad you're ok. Both of you. I should go. I'll send Kurt in."

She left, nodded at everyone and told Kurt to go in. As he was on his way, Jane started to leave. Zapata stopped her. "Hey." Their eyes met. "What you did, that was pretty awesome." Silently they communicated a truce and deeper respect. Jane offered a small smile before leaving.

Kurt walked into Allie's room. "How you feeling?"

"I'll feel better once I get out of here."

He chuckled. "It's good to see your attitude hasn't changed."

"Yeah, well. Listen Kurt—no offense but I really don't want you or any man in here right now."

"OK, I'm here if you need me." He kissed her cheek then turned to leave.

"Kurt—before you go—there's something I want you to think about. I realize there's a lot I don't know, that you and the others can't tell me. And I'm ok with that."

"But?"

"I trust Jane. My gut tells me that she'd die for you and your team. And because of my connection to you, she'd give her life for me and our child too. I'd like her to be the godmother." Kurt blinked and it was Allie's turn to chuckle. "Just promise me that you'll think about it. We can talk once I'm out of here."

He nodded. As he was half-way out the door, "She's in love with you." Kurt shook his head, not sure what to think exactly.

He assured the others that Allie and the baby were fine then excused himself. He may not have all the answers just yet but he knew had to go apologize to Jane.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Jane was punching her bag when the doorbell rang. She turned off the music and went upstairs. She looked to see Kurt and opened the door. "You didn't stay with Allie long."

"She didn't want me there." Jane nodded. "I didn't mean to disturb you but I was hoping we could talk."

She nodded and let him in, "Beer?"

"Please."

"So, what's up?" She took a seat at the kitchen table.

"I wanted to apologize." Jane blinked. "When I yelled at you to get away from Allie, it wasn't personal." Jane laughed. "It wasn't. I would have reacted that way to anyone. Anyone without a medical license to touch and operate on the woman who was carrying my child. Anyone."

Jane met his eyes which held hers for a long moment. Finally, she nodded. "I believe you. Thank you."

It was his turn to laugh. "What are you thanking me for?"

Jane smiled at his incredulity. "I know you don't like to admit when you're wrong. I appreciate the step."

Kurt leaned across the table, taking her hands in his. "I'm thanking you and appreciating you. For being as stubborn as I am and not giving up. It's because of who you are that my child is still alive. I can't tell you how much that means to me. You have my trust back Jane. Completely."

Jane bit her lower lip and he could tell that she was trying not to cry. Kurt stood and pulled her to him. "Come here." She went into his arms and he held her tightly.

As he was holding her Kurt noticed a pillow and comforter in the bathroom. "What's that?"

Jane turned, letting go from him, she wiped the tears from her eyes. "I sometimes sleep in there."

"How long has that been going on?"

"Since Director Carter kidnapped me and Oscar killed him." She started to walk away, in her own thoughts, seemingly. "I had no reference when he waterboarded me. One more time and I knew I was going to die. With the CIA, when they waterboarded me, among other things it was different. Killing Oscar set free a range of blocked memories—bits and pieces—I remembered Roman training me, how to survive. With Carter I had no reference."

The true horror of what she had been through dawned upon Kurt. His voice hoarse, "I am so sorry Jane. If I could go back and prevent-"

"Neither of us can." She looked outside. It had begun to rain. Kurt came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her. She leaned back into him, closing her eyes. Jane could feel her heart speeding up. It would be so easy to turn around and kiss him. She wanted to. But she also knew she wouldn't be able to separate what needed to be done with her feelings for him. So, she just rested for a moment.

He kissed her head and Jane took a step away—she needed to put some space between them. She walked over and took a sip of her beer. "Have you thought about how you might change your apartment to make it baby friendly?"

Kurt started at the first question. "Allie's only just past the first trimester."

"It's never too soon to plan. Or to get ready. Time goes by so fast—especially with what we're up against. If you don't watch out the baby will be here tomorrow." Jane took another sip of her beer.

"About the baby. Allie wants you to be the godmother."

Jane stared. "You can't be serious."

"I am. Allie trusts you and she knows you'd die to protect my child."

"Me being your child's godmother is impossible Kurt. With Sandstorm, you should get Allie and the baby as far away from here as possible. There's something I didn't tell you about Roman. When we were children…" she told him the story. "He said that if I didn't come back to him that he would find my rabbit and make it bleed. Trust me Kurt, your child is better if I have nothing to do with him."

"I see your logic but Allie won't go away."

"She doesn't know everything."

"She knows enough. And she's like you in that she won't back down from a fight."

Jane stared at him. She gulped. "You really believe in me again, don't you?"

Kurt's heart tore at the doubt, hope and desperation in her eyes. "I do." He stood and pulled her towards him.

Sensing his intent, Jane backed away. "I can't do this. Not now."

Kurt's brows came together in confusion. "I thought—"

"I know and I do but—" She met his eyes, pleading with him to understand, to not make her say it.

He gave a sarcastic laugh and ran a hand over the top of his head. "Well this is something I didn't see coming either. You don't trust me."

"I do trust you Kurt. It's just…"

"You don't believe I won't leave you alone again. That I won't doubt you again. Listen to me, I won't."

"You have no idea how much I wish that were true but you don't know that. There's still so much that we don't know, that I don't know…"

"Then we'll find out together. Your past doesn't matter."

"You told me that before. Then you wouldn't listen to a word I had to say."

"Jane."

Jane turned from him, tears starting to come. "I left you 24 messages Kurt. 24. You didn't listen to any of them. There were things on them that were personal, that the FBI, that Nas, the NSA doesn't know."

"Tell me now." He reached for her and he felt the tension increase in his body as she took a step back.

"I can't. it doesn't matter anymore."

"Jane— "

"I'm hanging on by a thread Kurt. I need to focus. If you were to doubt me again…I can't let things get personal again. When they're personal, that when everything crashes."

"You don't mean that."

"I have to. To get through this and stop Sandstorm from doing whatever it is that my other's planning, I have to. And I'm asking you to respect that."

She met his eyes. Kurt could feel the knots forming in his chest as she looked at him. Her eyes seemed to bare into his soul. He hadn't realized how much she was hurting too. And he was the cause of it. At last, he nodded. "Fine. For now, I'll respect that and keep things professional between us." He took a step towards her. "But I swear to you Jane, I'm not giving up. You will believe in me, in us again. And when you do, I'll be waiting." Then without warning he kissed her quickly though still possessively and without care. "Some day. I'll let myself out."

As he walked away, Kurt felt her eyes on him. He smiled but he didn't look back. Because he knew if he did, he wouldn't leave. His non-rational mind would persuade her to get more physical and he couldn't do that now. He had to win her trust back. The question was how?


End file.
